Day By Day© by Chris Muir.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Letterman was actually funny!

Courtesy of the Media Research Center we get the transcript of an actually funny David Letterman moment:

From the January 11 Late Show with David Letterman, the 'Top Ten Proposed Changes at CBS News.' Late Show home page: 10. Stories must be corroborated by at least two really strong hunches. 9. 'Evening News' pre-show staff cocktail hour is cancelled until further notice. 8. Reduce '60 Minutes' to more manageable 15-20 minutes. 7. Change division name from 'CBS News' to 'CBS News-ish' 6. If anchor says anything inaccurate, earpiece delivers an electric shock. 5. Conclude each story with comical 'Boing' sound effect. 4. Instead of boring Middle East reports, more Powerball drawings. 3. To play it safe, every 'exclusive' story will be about how tasty pecan pie is. 2. Not sure how, but make CBS News more like 'C.S.I.' 1. Use beer, cash and hookers to lure Tom Brokaw out of retirement.